Guests of The Nothing Club
by Gillan1220
Summary: SELF-INSERT: A group of foreign hikers join a unlikely party of anthropomorphic animals in the middle of the Wisconsin wilderness. Basically a retelling of my favorite episode of Camp Lazlo.
1. Chapter 1

**Guests of the Nothing Club**

Author's Note and Foreword: A self-insert fic of my favorite episode in Camp Lazlo. I do understand while the episode was released around 2005 but I changed it to 2017 to the include SnapChat, smartphones, and go-pro. Yes, our favorite characters of Cartoon Network did not age but hey we never see them right. The first chapter is basically retelling how the events unfurled. Not exactly the best fanfiction I have written out there.

The OCs I wrote here are my friends and this event is based on a hike I went with them last January 7, 2017. I will post the photo of the hike in my Deviantart. Follow me on DeviantArt GodEmperorGillan for further behind the scenes.

It would be unlikely for Filipinos (or humans) to be found in the middle of the State of Wisconsin (where Camp Lazlo is set in) but for sake of humans mingling with Cartoon Network characters, I have kept the tradition.

* * *

CHAPTER I

"Why don't you go to your own club. Oh that's right, you don't have a club, do you Lazlo? You've got nothing! The Nothing Club. That's your club!" a boastful Edward shouted at Lazlo below as he slammed shut the covers of the window of the treehouse. Behind him, Raj and Clam were partying and having a good time. Lazlo was left out.

"Nothing club?" The spider monkey replied with a sad face forming. "That's my club. Nothing."

In his sorrow, Lazlo began drawing a square on the dirt with his foot. After it was complete, Lazlo stepped in the square. "Alright, the nothing club." Lazlo sighed. A few seconds later, his sadness of being left out instantly disappeared when an idea popped out from his head. A smile replaced his sad face as began "drawing" his ideas out of thin air to make the best of The Nothing Club.

"Here's the couch and the juice bar. Restrooms are down the hall next to the pool. Exits are clearly marked. Hmm, I could move the vending machines next to the kitchen. Is that a drop I felt? I need to repair the roof before I lay down the new carpet. Oh, looks like I'm lost in the hall of mirrors again. Now why on earth did I have this silly thing installed?

Lazlo began "tracing" his way out of the "Hall of Mirrors" he created. Even in the thin air, he followed a pattern. To someone's view, Lazlo looks like a lunatic but to Lazlo's perspective, everything he mentioned is all but "real."

"It'd take me hours to find my way out." Lazlo commented before bumping to an imaginary mirror. "Oh silly me, it was a mirror. Wrong, left turn, that's me, haha."

* * *

"Settle down, settle down now." Edward banged the gavel down to the table. The crowd of campers quieted down to let the leader of their club speak.

"Now that we've got the fun and games out of our system, it's time for us to get down to the reason why we all are here. It all goes does to how we all despite Lazlo! Welcome to the Anti-Lazlo club!"

* * *

"There you go, that's a good boy." Lazlo said as he patted an imaginary animal in the thin air.

"Lazlo, what are you doing?" Mina the giraffe asked, confused.

"Oh hey Mina, I was just feeding our mascot. Our club has a dinosaur for a mascot."

Baffled, Mina began scanning the area around Lazlo's square. She could not what Lazlo meant as the club mascot.

"It was a gift from the Emperor of France." Lazlo added.

"What club?" Mina asked.

"The Nothing Club." Lazlo replied.

"What is the Nothing Club?" The giraffe asked, still confused.

"It's a club that we make up together."

"Together? That's pretty cool."

"Yeah, wanna join?"

"Sure!" she replied.

"Door's open but watch your head." Lazlo warned.

"No need, I raised the doorway."

"Then I lowered it again."

"Then I guess I hit my head."

Then the pair laughed inside their square. Slowly but surely, Lazlo did not feel left-out anymore. He was having a good time with Mina and their imaginary club.

* * *

Unfortunately for Edward, the foundation of his club began to backfire against him. When he tried to ask the fellow campers why they despise Lazlo so much, they could not give him a concrete answers. Instead, they gave him reasons why they like Lazlo, for the spider monkey had been selfless in giving back at them.

Edward was incensed with the lack of reasons. Annoyed, he tried one last ditch to make the campers hate Lazlo even more. The sight of Raj and Clam moving to the beat of music only they could hear enrage Edward even further.

"Hey, what are you two doing by the window?"

"It's Lazlo. He's got a pretty good club going down there." Raj told Edward while dancing to the "beat".

"A club?" Edward asked, raising a brow. "What club!?"

Approaching the window, he stared down to the sight of Lazlo and Mina dancing in the square below them. "That's not a club, that's nothing!" Edward replied angrily.

"Don't you hear the great music?" asked Raj.

Chip and Skip joined in, drawn into the music that they could also hear. "Oh year, I hear it now. I love this guy!"

"Are you crazy? That's no...hey is that your brother down there?"

In the time Edward try to reason with them to make them stay in his club, Chip already joined Lazlo and Mina below. Skip then followed suit, followed by Samson, then everybody much of Camp Kidney. He failed to convince his fellow members not to follow despite the fact Lazlo's club has no door, walls, or anything. As they entered Lazlo's empty square, everyone seemed to be having fun. After Raj and Clam entered, the Nothing Club was more lively than ever.

Back at the treehouse, an envious Edward looked below, confused and enraged. He tried everything he did for the campers to appreciate what he did. The disco they had the previous night was nothing Lazlo and his friends at the Jelly Cabin had experienced. Yet, in his desperate attempt to discredit Lazlo, it ultimately backfired. The scouts of Camp Kidney preferred to be in Lazlo's empty square called the Nothing Club rather than Edward's Anti-Lazlo club in the treehouse which he made effort to provide music, drinks, and Anti-Lazlo merchandize.

In frustration, he banged his head on the wooden board three times while shouting Lazlo's name in anger, making the treehouse shake around him.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER II

"Welcome to the Wisconsin wilderness." I said to my group mates as we hiked this trail leading to Prickley Pines. We had been hiking for an hour after our contact in Milwaukee dropped us along the forest which was a popular hiking trail that lead to the campsites lining Lake Michigan. I was currently hiking with my friends who were my former group-mates in our mountaineering club back then in the Philippines. We were going to overnight here in the vicinity of Prickley Pines before heading back to Milwaukee. I brought with me this tactical backpack I brought from Tactical Joe Store for PHP 2,600 ($47) that would fit for both airsoft and camping. The only things I packed with me are these essentials for hiking such as clothes, canned food, MREs I ordered from the Internet, toiletries, flashlights, glow-sticks, a lighter, and a first aid kid. Furthermore, I placed a Gadsden Flag (Don't Tread On Me) and Philippine Flag velcro patch on my pack, therefore representing my country. With me is my adventurous friend JJ, our mountaineer expert (in the Philippines anyways) Matt, our friend Simon, this girl named Gabrielle who preferred to be called Gaille for short, and our Papua New Guinean architectural student named Alex. JJ brought two additional guests with us: his Australian high school classmate called James and James' Fil-Am girlfriend from New York City named Dana. We were a multiracial group but nonetheless we enjoyed each other company as we hiked in this Midwestern wilderness.

"You can say that again, hope we don't get lost. All we have is this map of the State of Wisconsin and a compass as our guide." My friend JJ said, trudging through the dirt path with his camping backpack on his back.

"I hope to reach a river soon, so I can pose like a mermaid." Gaille said.

"Well, for sure Gaille, we can stop by many creeks and rivers and you can pose like a mermaid proudly representing your province of Bohol." I said.

Of course, we were not used to hiking in this temperate climate for obvious reasons. I have been to Sirao Peak with these people once on cold rainy January day, but Wisconsin being situated in the American Midwest would be colder than Cebu.

"Hiking in Papua New Guinea is much different mate. Majority of the country is rural and unexplored. The tropical jungles there are lush and virgin but it is dangerous. There are many hostile natives as well as poisionous plants and venomous animals.:

"Yikes, that sounds scary." James the Australian guy added. "But you've heard of Australia where everything is literally is out to kill you, from tornadoes to great white sharks."

"Scary, wait till we get lost and get attacked by some Wendigo, Mothman, Goatman, or some Slenderman and stuff like that." Simon added. "Oh, I forgot to tell you guys I'm from Siquijor and you all know that my province is associated with witchcraft and black magic. Think of it as Louisiana but only in the Philippines."

I don't really believe in those things to be honest. It is the Summer 2017 and we have not caught anymore of those cryptids. The Slenderman meme already reached its peak around 2012-2013, but now it has largely died down. "Hey, why not reserve those scary stories for tonight?" I told Simon.

Moving on, I made sure I was near my friend Gaille. The truth is I had a thing for her back then but now I am here making sure she is safe. As we hiked along the dirt path, her and I were talking about lots of things ranging from adventures and EDM shows. Gaille likes both of them. I told her once our group heads to Chicago we can go to conquer the city during one of the EDM shows.

An hour later, the group stops for lunch in one of the wooden tables set up by the U.S. National Park Service around dirt trails for hikers to rest and eat. There were a lot of hikers that day, not only us. We greeted them as we ate. I obtained from my pack an Arby's beef sandwich. You can never find these things in the Philippines so I took the chance to taste some fast food not found in my country. JJ, Simon, and Matt took out some packed food he cooked from the night before. Gaille took out a packed Burger King Whooper while James and Dana took out a mix of Domino's Pizza and Taco Bell. We talked and laughed about good times as we ate and drank. These are the memories and moments we all live for, good food and good vibes. We then took out are smartphone cameras and GoPros and took many shots and footage of this memorable trip.

After we ate, we then left the dining place taking our trash with us. Even as mountaineers from a different country, we followed the Leave-No-Trace (LNT) principle whereever we go. Furthermore, it is to show that we are educated people that care for the environment.

We then continued our hike towards Prickley Pines.


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER III

"Okay guys, we are getting closer to Prickley Pines. We can take a quick stop a Camp Kidney though. Based on this guide, Camp Kidney is a famous rest stop for hikers on their way to the town." Matthew said. "So let's get moving.

We walked for another 20-30 minutes before arriving at the entrance of Camp Kidney. Strangely there was no one behind, not even the scoutmaster there to greet us.

Simon joked again: "Maybe the Slenderman took them." I let out a short chuckle.

And then we heard it, party music. The new EDM genre, something that Gaille to dance a bit. It was playing The Chainsmoker's Closer. "Whoever these guys are, they have good taste of party music." She said.

"Yep. They must miss the city as much." Dana added. "Or they just want to add to the EDM scene to this rural part of Wisconsin."

We followed the sound of the music that lead to the back of the camp. To our surprise, we saw a group of anthropomorphic animals and some human hikers dancing in an empty square drawn from the ground. Even some park rangers from the U.S. Department of the Interior decided to take a break and join the fun.

"Unbelievable." I said.

"Are those animals and people dancing?" Gaille said.

"It appears so. They are in a middle of an empty square. No walls, no windows, no doors, yet there is music and they appear to be busy enjoying." JJ said.

"Reminds of that episode of Spongebob Squarepants where they used the box and their imagination produced the sounds." I joked.

"This is ain't our imagination though, we all can hear the music." James added.

Suddenly, this cute spider monkey "exited" the club and introduced himself to us. "Greetings my fellow humans. My name is Lazlo and this is my club called The Nothing Club. You guys are welcome to join in."

"Did you just say The Nothing Club?" JJ asked.

"Yes, The Nothing Club because it initially started out as nothing and then became something as we brainstormed our ideas." Lazlo replied.

Initially, we were shocked and appalled. These people and anthropomorphic animals were able to make an imaginary club become a reality. Maybe Spongebob and Patrick were right, we just have to use our imagination. The thought however sunk on me about how we can make things if we make it real.

"By the way, my I know your names and where you guys came from?" Lazlo asked.

"My name's Matthew and I'm from Cebu, Philippines."

"Hi Lazlo, my name is Gillan and I'm from Cebu too."

"Call me JJ, I'm from Cebu as well."

"My name is James, I'm from Australia and this my girlfriend Dana."

"Hi, may name's Dana. I'm Filipino-American. I'm from New York but I'm currently having my education in Manila same with my boyfriend James."

"I'm Alex and I'm from Papua New Guinea."

"Oh nice to meet you guys. Come right in." Lazlo said.

After we got introduced, Lazlo led us to the "door" into The Nothing Club. As he opened the imaginary door, we heard the music loudly. To welcome us, this elephant who was the club's DJ changed the song to Manian's Welcome to the Club to welcome us, the new comers to this place.

We felt welcome and at home with this group of anthropomorphic animals and some people partying and dancing in this empty square. To the outside, we look like a bunch of crazy people but once you step inside The Nothing Club, we can do anything we want. I then took out my smartphone and took pictures of the people and the animals partying, taking huge selfies one after the other. I posted some videos and photos on SnapChat and Instagram stories. My hiking group also did the same, taking out their smartphones for photos and or videos. It was living proof enough the imagination can become reality. I had to shout as I called my members' names as the music was really loud enough to drown out our voices. The music was all EDM and Rap, mixed with songs from the artists DJ Snake, Hardwell, Afrojack, Zedd, Eminem, and many others. At some point, I see this anthropomorphic white platypus come up next to the "door" of the Nothing Club. I could hear Lazlo call him up from inside, inviting him to join over. I could not here his reply but I could see him try the turning the "knob" to the door of The Nothing Club.

"I hear it!" The platypus known as Edward said in disbelief and awe as he tried to enter. "I hear it! I hear it!"

Before he could enter however, this anthropomorphic moose I assume to the scoutmaster appeared and grabbed Edward by the shoulder. I could hear the conversation well since the "door" was left open.

"Hold it!" The scoutmaster said. "You're the mutated beaver who organized the boat building, aren't you? Well beaver, you just turn around and march around to the beach and salvage all those boats from the bottom of the lake and build them all again! NOW!"

I assume Edward got in trouble for something unknown to me and my group judging by the scoutmaster's tone. As I saw him walk away is disappointment, Lazlo called out Edward one last time before the platypus left.

"Hey Edward, where you going? Edward! I would like to thank you for this club!" Lazlo shouted to Edward.

Edward stopped on his tracks and looked back, happy and touched that despite his hate for Lazlo, he was able to make him and the fellow campers as well as a few human guests happy. He actually felt bad for what he did but somehow he felt that he redeemed himself when gave the idea of The Nothing Club to Lazlo.

"Thanks for Nothing!" Lazlo shouted.

I was still in the middle of partying when Gaille took out her GoPro and called out the rest of the crowd. She planned to make a vlog of this once we got back to the Philippines. Taking out the selfie stick, she then expanded it to full height so that everyone behind her could be seen.

"Hey guys, say hi to the camera. Hi!" She said.

I showed up with the flag of the Philippines in my hand, yelling "PH represent!"

It had almost been 30 minutes since we were here and the house was till pumping. At this point, more hikers started appearing with Lazlo welcoming them into his club. I was guessing at this rate we would reach the campsite next to Prickley Pines by sundown. So I then called out Matthew in the midst of all the dancing and imaginary drinks.

"Hey Matt, when do you guys wanna keep going?"

"Let's just enjoy as much as possible Gill. After all, everything is free here." He replied. The crowd even got wilder with everyone singing along to Krewella's Alive. Oh what a matching song for the moment we were in. Following his advice, I continued dancing and interacting with the crowd. I also used this moment to party with Gaille, as I never did when I was undergrad and during the annual Sinulog Festival. Dang, she parties hard. I then go near Lazlo to thank him for this moment, even though I was dumbfounded at the thought of an imaginary nightclub in a camp located in the middle of the Wisconsinite wilderness.

"Hey Lazlo, I just want thank you for Nothing! My friends and I have are definitely gonna remember this moment."

"Sure thing buddy!" He said as the party never stopped.

A lot of memories and moments were made that day and it stayed for with us in minds (and our cameras to be soon posted on Facebook, YouTube, Tumblr, Instagram, and Twitter) as we left the States a few days later and returned back to our home in the Philippines.

THE END


End file.
